Our hope is for this site to be a inspiration to everyone that comes across it. We have been married for 18 years and together for 25+ years. With that said we have been through a lot and felt it our duty to share some things with other married couples that hopefully will save or strengthen others marriages. God bless you and your family!

Genesis 2:18 The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.


Wednesday, August 5, 2015

How to have a forever kind of LOVE

I was watching a tv show the other night and noticed that after 25 years of marriage and 4 kids this couple decided that they were going to get a divorce. And of course the first thing that came to mind was WOW. After 25 years why could they not have worked it out and made 25 more years of memories. However, what I have come to realize is even if we have the best of intentions to be together forever it does not always work out that way. And to be totally honest with you it really makes me sad when couples have the option for divorce on the table at all. I believe that there are ways to continue to love each other and grow together instead of apart but that requires WORK on both sides.

Here are a few things that have sustained me and my hubby's marriage for 15 years but together for 24 years. I felt it my duty to share what has helped us in our pursuit to achieving that FOREVER kind of LOVE even when it's just me and my spouse! Well what I mean by that is that when you first get together it's all roses and you can't get enough of each other, than you begin to have children and they become the center of your world. And you forget about the things you shared with your spouse that made you fall in love in the first place. It might have been the way she looks at you, the way he rubs your back, or maybe a song that reminds you of each other. You no longer take the time to look into each others eyes and really have a conservation that does not involve the kids, bills, your jobs or anything other than the two of you. I know we all love our children and our lives can so easily get consumed by being the best parents, but what we have to realize is one day they are going to grow up and leave the nest. Than it will be just you and your spouse "hopefully" if you work at putting each other first. But guess what if you don't take the time to continue to grow and know who your spouse is becoming over the years you will find yourself saying we have grown apart and end up in divorce court. The best gift that you can give your kids is the example of a marriage filled with love, compassion, laughter, togetherness and friendship. That is the example you want to set for them to model so that they continue the generations of POWERFUL marriages and know how to accomplish that "FOREVER KIND OF LOVE".

So to help avoid this at all cost let's get down to the basics:

1. Make God the third strand in your marriage. If you have not yet been connected to the vine get connected because without him you all don't stand a chance.

2. Take divorce off the table don't let the devil tell you that it's better on the other side because 9 times out of 10 it's not.

3. Work at your marriage daily which means put the other persons needs before your own and you both will end up getting just what you needed from the other person without even thinking about it.

4. Date your spouse find time each day to do something nice for them and find time at least once or twice a month where you all go out and have a good time together and focus on just the two of you. The date does not have to cost anything it's just about you all enjoying each others company. And the little things go a long way it may be something as simple as texting your spouse I love you, or have a great day, rubbing their feet or back whatever you know your spouse loves for you to do make it a habit to do it more often and I promise it will work out for your good.

5. Don't let the kids be all that you all have in common try new things and experience things together it never hurts to try something at least once even if you may not be jumping for joy to begin with in the end you may find out that you really enjoyed yourself.



6. Avoid pushing buttons with your spouse that you know will upset them or get them worked up this way you avoid unnecessary confrontation that will lead to an argument that will most likely end up bad.

7. Be your spouses friend be the one that they can come to and talk about anything and know that you will never use what is spoken against them but will always help, motivate, inspire and love them through. Genesis 2:18 Then the Lord God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him."

8. Remember that you all are a team and that you all can accomplish much more together than apart. Work together teamwork truly does make the dream work. God said in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him-a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

9. Never stop desiring one another keep it interesting in the bedroom remember make time to attend to each other's needs and never make each other feel that you are uninterested.

10. And last but certainly not least never allow the sun to go down and you're mad with one another. This is actually one of the things that me and my husband started out doing in the beginning and as we got more into our marriage we stopped doing, however we have worked our way back to this very important principle. And in closing marriage is a beautiful thing and well worth the work you put into it! If you can remember what made you fall in love with the person daily even when they have gotten on your last nerve that will allow you to continue to love that person in spite of their faults or shortcomings. Always remember we are not perfect and we are all works in progress so if you both work to be the best you daily it would be that much greater when you all come together as a couple. Remember to say I apologize forgive me.

Kiss every chance you get. Hug him like you mean it! Having a goal helps us make choices that free us. What you do EVERY DAY matters more than what you do ONCE IN A WHILE.
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