I have heard a lot of couples that say they are getting a divorce because they grew apart. For me that is not an option in our marriage because me and my husband have made a commitment to one another that no matter what we will support each other in everything. Also you have to take the option of divorce off the table that's the easy way out. With that being said I think a major mistake that some couples make is they leave room for things to go wrong and you may be saying what does that mean?
Well here are a few questions I want you to answer truthfully to help in your marriage.
1. Do you both communicate with one another on a daily basis and especially before making decisions?
2. Do you take your spouses opinions into account before making decisions?
3. Do you think about how the other would be affected by your decisions?
Something that Cleavon and I have decided a long time ago in our marriage is that we would continue to date each other even after marriage. Not only that but, while on that date we talk about each other not the kids. We made a conscious decision to continue to connect on an intimate leave with one another because we know that one day our kids will be grown and gone on to live their lives. If your marriage is totally about just the kids what happens once their all grown up and leave home? You end up saying we grew apart and I’m not happy anymore. When in reality you hadn’t been happy for a long time and have grown apart a long time ago. Because you weren't taking the time to continue to connect with your spouse outside of only talking about the kids and the household bills etc. However you were so wrapped up in the kids that you didn’t notice the changes that were happening right in front of your eyes. And now that you no longer have your safety zone (the kids) you are forced to see what was in front of you all the time. Marriage takes work on both parts and if you’re not ready to do the work you will end up alone.
Today my husband did something that I thought was so sweet and it prompted me to really take a look at how much this man truly loves me! We had been so busy this weekend and did not really get a chance to see one another he asked if I was not busy to come and meet him because he needed to look into my eyes. Wow "my reply, was a big smile and an absolute YES and what time my love"? I also advised him that yes I felt that as well and needed some cuddle time as well. So we met and it was totally a small thing to some but that is the type of small things you have to do to ensure your marriage stands the test of time. You never want to take for granted that your love will always be there and that your spouse does not have needs. At this point in our lives we are encountering some life changing things and if were not careful we certainly could find ourselves growing apart. However, for Cleavon and I that is certainly not an option so we take the small things and do them continuously everyday to ensure we grow together in life during every stage of our lives. I urge you to take the time to fertilize your marriage so that it will continue to grow and you and your spouse have the support from one another to always be able to grow but grow together as one.
My prayer is for everyone that reads this post to be helped in your marriage, That it will grow and flourish to be all that God has purposed for it to be as one unit and that you walk together always. I pray that you take the time each day to meet each other’s needs and keep the lines of communication open at all times. And most importantly if you have not placed God at the center of your union that you do so now and always pray together and for one another. In Jesus name Amen
Kiss every chance you get. Hug like you mean it! Having a goal helps us make choices that free us. What you do EVERY DAY matters more than what you do ONCE IN A WHILE.
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